Hi all,

I'm quite new here. My younger sister is on the verge of losing her kids to social servises. They are in the right sorry to say, my sister needs help. Well as it stands I am probably going to end up with the kids, because needles to say I wont want them to go to a foster home with strangers they are only 2 1\2 and 5 years old. To top it of the 5 year old boy is either an FAS child or hes autictic.He is very hard to deal with.
I hope im up to this challange. Ive been praying about it several times a day, and monday is coming way to fast. i find out on monday if i need to go get the children.
Sorry to rattle on.
Thanks
Becca

Has anyone done an intervention with your sister yet to get her into rehab. Do you have family and friends to support you. What about a church group. Since you say the older boy may have FAS, I am guessing your sister has a problem with alcohol. Is there an active AA in your area. You and family should attend some support meetings for family, it's called Al-Anon I think. Talk to your clergy, also, they may be able to offer you some resources.

I used to teach disadvantaged pre-schoolers, many of whom were delayed. You need to get both children to a doctor and get a professional diagnosis. I do not know what services are availbale in Canada, but I suspect there are age-appropriate progams that will address any delays, disablilites, and will help socialize them.

Bless your heart for taking on such a huge responsibility; you are probably the best thing that has happened to those babies.

Ohiorose53,

I live about 500 km form my sister, I have tried to talk to her but any time I do her first responce is that she will cut me out of there lives. She is not active in any church.
We were raised in diferent homes ourselfs her with our mother, and me with my grandparent. I definetly had the better home. As it stands I am her only support. But thinking about it I think she may be FAS also. I just want do what is best for the babies.

Becca,

It was nice chatting with you in the chatroom this morning...

I will certainly keep you & the family in my prayers. Those kids are lucky to have you for an aunt!

Take care & please keep us posted!

Becca
You are in my prayer I hope that everything works out for the best for the children and you. Sounds like your sister is scared and throwing up walls. I'm not sure I understand the FAS is?

Keep us posted as you can and chin up for now.

Deb, it's Fetal Alcohol syndrome - caused by the mother drinking excessively during pregnancy - it causes brain damage in babies. It's a very sad thing to happen.

Becca, I'll continue to keep you all in my prayers. Hugs!!

Gerda

Becca,

You're still in my prayers...hoping all works out for the best tomorrow!

Thank you all so much, I am struggling and praying that I do the right thing. At this point I think I am going to ask my sister to give me temporary custody of the little girl, so she can go into a structered home and learn how to help her little boy. I hate to break up a family but I think that having two of them is just to much for her right now. I am a stay at home mom with a child in school all day, so I could give the little one the extra loving she needs. The reason I dont think I could take the boy is because he and my child do not get along and I dont think it would be fair to my own child to take on him and all his many problems, also, I dont think im capable of dealing with both children. Is it wrong of me to help one but not the other?? im going to do all i can to see that he gets the help he needs, but i still feel bad.

Thank you all so much for the prayers, God bless all of you.

Becca

Becca,

I think that by making it easier for your sister to take care of the little boy, you ARE helping both!

Becca i am sorry I did not respond to this sooner..somehow, I missed your post.
I will be happy to send out prayers and good thoughts. I think by taking the child you can best manage, you are doing everyone a favor. It would not be fair to inflict that upon your own home and family (your child and this other not getting along) You can only do as much as you can do, while keeping your own family first priority. I won't say I know what you are going thru, but I kind of have an inkling...my older sister is very ill, with bi-polar, manic depression, all treatable, but refused to take meds prescribed. as a rsult it has been years since I have seen her or my two neices..who are adults now. When it is family, you feel as though you have to tread very carefully. I read somewhere once, that no one can love you like family can..but also that no one can hurt you like family can. how true that is. best wishes to you.